I understand now why I’m so bothered by the guy standing me up. It wasn’t that he no showed, it was because of his attitude that if I wasn’t looking for a relationship, then he didn’t want anything to do with me at all. I hate the fact he pretended to be interested in the business opportunity just to get next to me. There was nothing in my approach that said I’m looking for a man.
It was kind of messed up, but I’ve done that before myself. Why bother getting to know someone you are attracted to and like them to only find out they probably won’t ever like you back?
In my situation a few years ago, I found myself liking a guy who would never like me back. I couldn’t stop thinking about him. Not healthy. I was a lot pissed that he implied he wouldn’t mind sleeping with me though I wasn’t Jessica Alba enough to date. Plus, I wanted to sever ties with a third person but I didn’t want to tell the guy to choose between a friendship with her and a friendship with me. So, I took myself out of the picture, wished him all the best, and never spoke to him again.
Ending my friendship with him was messed up on my part (or was it?) but if he knew I didn’t want to be friends with her, I didn’t understand why he kept bringing her up. I had nothing good or bad to say about her (actually I had lots of bad to say about her but I wasn’t going to say anything to him), so when he brought her up, I simply said “That’s nice.” and changed the subject.
I wasn’t sure if he was trying to mend a friendship that wasn’t meant to be between her and I but I wasn’t having that and for reasons I don’t feel like getting into today.
But I wish I could go back in time and do it all over again. I would simply say to him, “Look, I don’t like her, she’s too negative, and I don’t want to ever talk to her again so don’t bring her up.” And then I would tell him to go to hell for thinking so little of me for implying I’m good enough to screw but not good enough for a relationship.
I guess in the end, that friendship wasn’t meant to be. But I would have handled it differently. See?
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